The single most important thing to do, as a friend

Last Updated on January 20, 2020 by Michelle

This week the friend I’ve called “best” since middle school turns 29. Again. For the 20th time. And, no, our hair isn’t quite so big now-a-days as it was in the nineties…

In high school, Gina drove a used, red Pulsar that smelled of cigars and cherry car freshener–the first being remnants of the previous owner’s addiction and the second being G’s attempt at overriding said remnant. The result was a cherry cigar odor that wound up growing on us. Plus, who cares about the smell when the seats recline flat, allowing you to hide in the school parking lot when you’re supposed to be in study hall? (Did I just admit that?)

Keep reading, if you can stomach the 80s hair and don’t mind one more confession…

Friends… sometimes seem like they’re from the other side of a wide chasm

She had sauntered into my 7th grade classroom late in the morning one October day. I was a native Delawarean who thought lower Delaware (we called it “slower Delaware”) was a long drive. Her being from Baltimore meant she was from the other side of a wide chasm. Never mind it was only the Fort McHenry Tunnel. She was foreign. (And I didn’t even know then that she had been, literally, “made in China,” where her parents where missionaries.) But she quickly taught me that being a friend doesn’t mean being like each other, but liking each other for who you are, even in the awkward years of big hair, braces, and pimples.

… A friend loves at all times. Proverbs 17:17

Friends… the best ones are always recognizable

I don’t always recognize those 17-year-old giddy girls trapped behind our wrinkles and gray hairs today.

Those 17 year olds could have never handled knowing the grief they each had ahead of them, but they sure would have loved to have known how they’d hold each others hands, pray for each other continually, and stand beside each other–with meals or giant portions of Toblerone in hand when needed.

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If you could use a little encouragement in dealing with grief, you could start with this post.

If you’d like to know what brought a born-and-bred mid-atlantic suburban girl to a New England homesteading adventure, I wrote about our family’s move here.

And if you just need a chocolate fix, well you’ll love this recipe for Whoopie Pie Cookies. (I mean, who wouldn’t?)

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What I do recognize in her, always, are the traits for the bestest friend a woman could have.

Sure we passed notes in class and, well, hid in her Pulsar, but when a little nudge to do the right thing wasn’t enough, we would each make sure to shove the other in the right direction.

… One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor. But the way of the wicked leads them astray. Proverbs 12:26

Friends… sometimes come close to parting ways

As good as we were for each other, we almost parted ways over America’s Favorite pastime. You see, in my house, in 1983, there was no team superior to the Phillies. But she blatantly routed for the Orioles that World Series. The team that swept my beloved Rose. Schmidt. And McGraw. I didn’t like it one bit, but decided to just not talk baseball, so we could remain friends.

… Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared. Proverbs 22:24-25

Years later her dad took us to a game at the old Oriole park. It was free umbrella day, and I actually decided to keep the umbrella. In ’92 we finally put all baseball disagreements aside and traversed side-by-side in the Opening Day Parade for the Yard. We even met a few familiar faces.

Friends… teach us things

Not only did she introduce me to Ripken, over the years she has taught me that lobster claws make fine earrings, there is truly no better chocolate in the world than Toblerone, sometimes the best things ARE made in China, and, most importantly–>

Friendship should always improve who you are. If it doesn’t, you’re not doing it right.

… Iron sharpens iron, and one [friend] sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17 

Friends… the one thing you absolutely have to know

So that’s it really. You don’t have to play hide-in-seek in Pulsars (which is good, cause geez do any still exist?) or meet some famous major league players together (but that would be a fun bonus, especially if free umbrellas are involved). You just have to make sure you’re always improving each other. Enough said.

Love you, G. Have a wonderful 29th birthday. For the 20th time.

Around the homestead this week

We’re settling back into the steady rhythms of the homestead, now that we’ve been home from our 3-week road trip for over a week. We’ve almost caught up on laundry. Who am I kidding? That day will never come. But that’s okay. I truly didn’t realize how much I missed hanging out the clothes while we were traveling. There’s something relaxing about all the mundane, even old-fashioned things we do around here. Not easy… we don’t seem to ever choose the easy way… but relaxing nonetheless.

My giant 50-pound bag of let’s-see-if-Michelle-can-do-this arrived in the mail today! (Yes, my poor mail carrier pulls up in his orange jeep and plops the heaviest box I’ve ever made him carry right there on my front porch.) That’s right folks, I’m gonna try to mill our own flour. Boy I hope this works. If not, I still have a gorgeous kitchen accessory, no? (Go here if you’d like to know more about this NutriMill Harvest Grain Mill that I’m in love with.)

Bill checked in on our bees today and gave them their winter food. In my last Tuesday Live, over on facebook, I mentioned he was mixing up something yummy for the hives and many of you asked for the recipe. I’ll have to post that soon.

Bixby’s skunk oder is still lingering–especially if he gets wet at all… even just lapping up some water will do it. But it’s definitely improving, thanks to all the great pointers I shared with you in this post last month. But the biggest excitement was the fact that all four prodigal cats returned to the homestead this week! Watch the two fb lives below if you’d like “in” on the story. It’s a good one.

And to celebrate, RawPaws is sponsoring a fun contest over on my fb page. So make sure you join in the party! Go here to check it out and you may win $10 to spend on your favorite furry friend.

If you already ARE a subscriber, just hop over to the Resource Library here and enter your personal password. (If you don’t remember your password, no fear, we always include a personalized reminder in every Thursday email, “Hard Work, Simple Joys.”)